time for a quick and long update!!

Saturday 2 February 2008
Was late for work today.
But work was fun!!
Had so much laughter with Jia Wei today.
And I had so much to eat!!!
Lawrence treated me and Derrick lunch at Ajisen!!
He’s always treating me!!
I feel so awful for that.
Eric bought “dim sum’s” for me and Jia Wei.
It was his “parting gift” for us!
Many thanks to them!

Work ended and I went down to Far East Plaza.
They never fail to put a smile on my face!
Had a heart to heart talk with Tom.
And yes…
I’m going to have to let go.
No matter how tough.
Cause if I don’t…
I won’t be able to let anyone near my heart.
I’m not going to let the thoughts of YOU ruin my day/week/mood/life!

Sunday 3 February 2008
GOODBYE BEST DENKI NGEE ANN CITY.
Today was my last day.
Many thanks to all my colleagues!
It has been great working with you guys!!

Eric bought me a drink.
And we enjoyed it back at the storeroom.
We talked about aliens!!
LOL.
And yes…
I’ve finally heard Lionel’s voice.
It was nice. I liked it. (((:

Said my sad goodbyes to Tristan, Jia Wei, Elaine, John, Eric and Lionel.
They were the only ones around at that time.
Many thanks to Michael for all his guidance.
And Jia Wei and Tristan for all their help and laughter.
And Eric for all the nonsense chit chat sessions we had.
And Lawrence for all the help and treats to lunch!!
I’ll miss you guys!

I saw Tom on my way to the busstop.
He said my ponytail was sooooooooo cute!
And Eric said it looks neat!
Maybe I’ll tie it up more often!

Monday 4 February 2008
I’m a PIG!!!
I ate a lot today!!
I think I surprised Winson with my HUGE APPETITE!!
Oops!

Sighh.
Anyway…
Today I learned of the truth.
How should I put it?
Well…
Let’s just say that knowing all those stuff…
It made things so much easier.
Easier to let go.
I feel nothing.
I guess I got so used to being treated this way by guys.
NOTHING BUT A TOY!
I’m just disappointed I guess…
I almost just want to laugh it off.
What made me think that any guy would ever fall in love with me (including you)?

I need a shoulder to lie on.
Today I almost wanted to lie on (ahem’s) shoulder.
But I didn’t.
I know (ahem) wouldn’t mind.
I just didn’t want to send out any wrong unintentional messages.
It was the first time I let (someone) send me home.
I wanted to refuse.
But I was afraid I’d do something to harm myself.
I let myself be vulnerable for once.
And I let (ahem) do what he wanted.
To send me home.
To sms me to ask if I’m alright.
For once, I allowed someone to care for me so much.
When so many others had offered to do so.
I let myself be vulnerable for a night.
I let myself be taken care of for one night by someone who cared.
I wanted to cry.
But I had to be strong. I had to smile like what everyone expects of me.

Maybe Tom was right.
He’s afraid I’ll keep everything to myself.
Cause I think I’ve kept everything to myself that my heart’s going to burst soon.
Is it okay to be vulnerable once in a while?
Cause sometimes I long to lie on someone’s shoulder and catch my breath.
I miss the feeling of being taken care of.
To have someone to send me home and take the bus with and watch me safely enter the lift.
But…
I resolve to be single for a year.
That’s what I promised (sort of…) Wei Yi!
No relationships for me till 2009.
I believe I can do this!
I’m going to be HAPPY!!!
I don’t need a man to make it happen for me!!

Many love,

Meiyun

xoxo