i feel so sad today... =( dunno why also... just felt lonely all of a sudden. everybody cancelled on me!!! i can't even ask my classmates to go out. they went to my ex's house if i'm not mistaken... =( i went home with a very heavy heart. but my brother make me happy!! he told me that the computer is back to normal leh!! =)

last night, i was very confused with myself. when he didn't call me around 11 plus at night, i felt alone... i kept checking my phone for missed calls. but he finally called around 11.45pm. i felt kinda happy!! is it a routine now that we keep talking on the phone?? should i be expecting a call from him every night?? or should i not put my hopes too high up?? sometimes i do feel like we are a couple but deep in my heart, we are actually not... sometimes because of this, i don't wanna meet him. i will just say i'm tired or i meeting my other friends... sighh...

i remember on friday night when we went to watch Click, i felt some sort of unexplained distance between him... but when we went to have dinner at the market near my school, i felt very close to him. we ate on a same plate. i felt some sort of chemistry between us... when we were about to board the mrt, i grab his hand otherwise he would wait for the next train to come. in the past when willson held my hand, i would stare at our joined hands because i was silly in love. i wonder did HE do that when i grabbed his hand...?? i would if he did that to me... all because i am a really silly girl when it comes to love...

i still feel lonely now.... some sort of emptiness inside of me.... =(
[[should i tell HIM my blog address?? i want to but if he reads it and then ignore me then how?? i fear rejection]]